Choices

Whatever happens happens because of our choices.

 If you want to get God involved here. Some people  believed God should have stopped 911.

The men who orchestrated 911 had free will. Which gave them the gift of choice just as you and I have.

They made a choice to crash those planes into the Two Towers..I am sure there were people and things trying to deter their efforts but they were determine to do this catastrophic act..Forever after 911 changed how we deal with our security. We all thought nothing could happen to America on our own soil but it did.

America made a choice not to be so cavalier any longer.Those choices were forced upon us because of someone else' s destructive choice. We reacted to thier actions. Every day we make choices  that effects us and others. A cording to those choices we live our lives.

The Universe or God never takes away our free will to choose. It is always up to us how we react or act.

Our choices are powerful. Making a decision is power for you. Here is to us making good decisions which can bring us peace.

DAY TO DAY INSIGHT

Sometimes you really don't feel like doing something but you know if yiu do it will make you feel better.

Well I haven't been blogging because I felt I had nothing to say. Well that's not true We always can't be profound. just be who you are day to day

It will be 3 years ago my son has been without full time work. He has done every type of job just so he could work.

The issue here is not him working, well yes in a way, He has been living with me .His anger at not having a job and moving in with me and me no longer having my space and privacy I once had was quit a shock to our systems at first.

I have seen his efforts first hand trying to get a job in his field. then taking anything he can get. The temporary job offers are more and closer together and we are grateful for but  he just wants a full time job.

We have managed to live together these years because of communication. Sometimes somethings just have to be said and be uncomfortable in the moment but it brings better boundaries to  live in.

Right now we're alright. He gets out with friends and I have my church affairs so we each work at separate lives which allows for more insightful talks. And there is peace until the next bump in the road.

Building Another Path

The world is not much different than in times past. Different people different time.

LETS see now. When I was growing up there were songs sung about war and the need for change. I remember one song saying "The world won't get no better if you just let it be. We gotta change it both you and me."
Then there was the song War and the song talking about fat men sitting in their fat chair with their fat cigars with out a care.

These songs were in the 60's and70's but they still apply to today.The world lives out the same situations over and over again. Wouldn't you think they would learn from the past.?

We think because it's a different time everything is different. Those of us smart enough to read our history books knows that's not the case.Wow what a depressing thought that is..

Well I have some good news. Just because the world keeps making the same mistakes. Doesn't mean we have to as individuals.

Did you know the only person you can change is yourself. When we keep doing the same things wrong or just making mistaks over and over that is because we didn't learn from the first painful mistake .  So we are doomed to repeat the same mistake over and over untill we change our path. This is done through awareness.

This awareness for me came from people in my life. They gave  me these awareness so I could change for the better and stop hitting my head against a stone wall. (Do you know how much that hurts) My mentors gave me knowledge on how act and not react to people and circumstances. I needed a whole new set of tools to build another path. This is also called enlightenment. With that awareness, that enlightenment we will start to walk in peace.

Goofy Things We Do

Have you ever thought as if you are the only one that feels as you do or acts like you. Then somewhere down the line you find other people that have felt as do and have done little goofy things also.

When I used checks in the past I would get so nervous writting the check out when people were waiting in line. Some times I made a mistake. When I found out I was not the only one I felt a freedom of knowing that someone else was just as goofy as me. I started saying to myself that I'm not the fist to feel this way and won't be the last.Take your time and write your check.

Now this can be applied to any thing  you feel or do. I found out in Al-Anon that so many of my thoughts and actions were done by others trying to deal in an Alcoholic situations. Someone would say something and I would say to myself" Oh she did the same thing I did. Then I would eventually laugh with that person over what we had done. As I went on in the program I found loads of people who thought the same and had done the same silly things that I had.. It is a type of freedom  that lets you think more positive about yourself. 

So now I remind myself you are not first nor will  you  be the last to do what ever  makes me uncomfortable.

Life has a program for me and it's up to me how I play It out. It certainly gives me more peace to know I am helping others in some way. My life then become more peaceful and self confident.

We all need each other. Every person we come in contact with shows us how to live our life. They teach how we want our life to be or not to be. Bad behavior teaches us as much as good behavior

I wish you strength and peace...

Epiphany Saturday

Our service this Sunday was Soap box Sunday. This is when people get up to speak their minds about a certain subject that is on their minds.

In years past this Sunday could get real heated with different subjects. This Sunday was quit subdued. People who got up mostly talked about the conference the day before on stewardship. The name of the book was" This Is Not Your Parents Offering Plate" It was centered on a new way to looking at stewardship in churches.

We were to read the book before hand so we would really understand the theory. Well I did and I got more out of the workshop in doing that.The people who got up in church were talking about what they had learned that day.

My discovery that was oh so profound for me would just be amatter of speaking to someone else.The workshop I went to was on asking members for money for the church. I got wrangle in because all the others were taken by my group. So I went. I the person who would be the last person on earth to ask anyone for anything.

Well I have to say I had an epiphany and that is I am asking for my church not me. I realized that my love for my church would lunge me forward to do what ever I needed to do. That was an eye opening experience for me.

I would be representing my church not me and corresponding hopefully my love for my church.

That was my own private epiphany how much I love SWUU meaning the whole lot .The people, the pastor and our New Building you name it.

No greater love that one person have than to lay down their life for their friend. Me getting out of my own way and letting my concern be for my church members of today and for the future would be my expression of deep and abiding love.

Where there was fear there is now peace!

I have lived in Ohio all my life and I hate the cold and the snow after Christmas if it is too much.  Someone asked me why don't you move. I must say I was talking to someone else when this person made this remark. I ignored the other person who was not in our conversation but later it got me to thinking Why not move. What are my resons for staying in Ohio.

I like the seasons. My favorite time of the year is Spring. Everything comes alive bringing hope and a sense of well being through beauty. Summer is hot weather but it doesn't last no more than the cold will last in winter. Then again another beautiful time of the year,is fall. Even though we know winter is on it's way there is the beauty of the tree leaves turning fabulous oranges and reds mixed with the Evergreens is another sight of beauty.

My family and my church family . They mean so much to me. They are my support team.

It's my home and in my adult life I have chosen to stay. I made a choice willingly with all the knowledge available to me. Year after year I have made this informative decision on my own.

We all make decisions every day of our lives. We hopefully try to do what is best for ourselves and others. Some decisions will be made well informed and other on moments notice. The important thing is we try to do our best with the information we have at the time.If that decision was not the right one no one said you can't change it.

That is our blessing of free will to choose. This story is yours to write no one else.

Make your peace with the decisions of the past. You did the best you could do with the information you had. Live today  knowing you will make better decisions

Now go forth making peace in your heart and live your best today. .

Acceting Limitations

I'm back I can sit for a little while(smile).
I have had a lot of time to think so many things run through my mind. I guess I'll start with how I am feeling. Well I've been prety tired and just wanting to rest but also this great need to continue like I had nothing done. Stupid Huh.

Well it comes down to admitting I was vunerable. There were things I couldn't do for myself and still can't..    I 've always been self sufficient. I worked for what I wanted. My son learned if we didn't have the money for something he didn't get it. I worked two jobs brought up my son and went to school.

The only thing that marks my success is my son. He doesn't smoke or  drink. Out of a long line of alcoholics. The buck stopped here.

As you or I get older we slow down and some of us have a hard time accepting our limitation.  We all in some way grieve over what we use to do and now can't.. Some of us more than others.The special miracle here is to accept ourselves as we are. Then it is time to go on with our lives as best as possible.

This was my reminder of my limitations and to cool it and ask for help. So called my sister and she will be here to help me this week. My son is away house sitting for a member of our church. So he is not available.  Sometimes I think I rely on him too much.

So today I will do what I can and tomorrow my sister will help me wash cloths and will vacum for me.

I believe the lesson here is there is peace in accepting our limitations and from that comes the freedoms to do what we can. In turn we get peace of mind and all will be well.

Good Exhaustion

Well the holidays have left me exhausted but It is a good exhausted. I really enjoyed my holiday. Every thing went really smooth. It was one of the best.There is only my son, my sister and nephew.We all enjoyed each others company.

It was also our fist Christmas Holiday season in our own church building. Sitting there in the Christmas eve service was an emotional time.. I have always enjoyed the part where the lights go out and we are left holding lit candles in the dark.This time it was magnificent. A total feeling of oneness.

My church is a close congregation like an extended family. It is very nice seeing people practicing what they preach,really caring for each other.

Well I'm tired and tomorrow I have surgery. So send me good thought and prayers.

Oh yes and one more thing I'm looking forward to getting back to blandness. (Smile) Peace out!!

New Mind

Ready or not here it comes. Time waits for no one but everyone waits for time.

Have you ever waited and waited for something and you know it will be so great. It comes and then it is gone and you feel like the wind has been punched clear out of you. You might find your self saying; Is that all there is.

I think this happens after Christmas. All the Hype for buying this or buying that. .All the holiday  movies. cartoons and music leading up to that special  day has us all involved and geared up for Christmas.

The day after, you are tired and you don't want to think or hear the word Christmas.

This same thing happens with weddings. The planning , you get the hall ,the church the flowers the cake the dress and the dress worn by the matron or maid of honor.

After it is done there is that relief and the feeling of great satisfaction that it all came together. Then the fatigue and never wanting ti hear the word wedding again.

Life gives us these moments to apreciate the mundane in our lives. You have the sadness and then the happiness.We are never down where someone doesn't lend us a hand..There may be  very hard down and out times but the universe doesn't leave you there. Unless you are doing nothing to help yourself.

It is just law you must keep doing all you can do and help will come to you.

This year is winding down and I wonder what is ahead. I will welcome this New Year in ,like so many others, with the drop of the ball. And deep inside I'm wondering what's in store for my life, my family and my church family.

Time marches on as we wait for it and wonder what it will bring. The only way to face what ever comes our way is just to take it One Day at a Time.

I WISH EVERYONE LOVE, PEACE AND JOY!!!!!

Magic

Did you know that we can do magic, all of us.We are extremely magical creatures. We can do what no other animal can. We can reason and choose. And because of being able to reason and choose we can choose to forgive.

To forgive is the biggest magic we have.It does not happen over night. It takes time sometimes years.

Forgiving is a process of setting yourself free from your own jail.

For me IT started with a 12 step program. Then a group for adult children from dysfunctional families and then individual counseling. Like I said it's a process.

My magical powers slowly came to me through love. People who loved me till I could love myself.    My childhood had left me with little self confidence, low self esteem ,lots of anger and little power over my own life.

I was in complete victim mode. I had to learn what I was responsible for and what I was not. I could not change my childhood and I had to know IT WAS NOT MY FAULT. It was nothing I did or said. In that case I was the victim.

I had to get out of that mode. I was dealing with adult problems in my childhood survival mode.      It was now time to take back my power.I would no longer be a puppet. I was manipulated and controlled by my parents in every way they interferenced with my life. Their biggest manipulation was fear.Al ways telling me what I could not do. They were so worried for my safety so I could not live by myself.. I was not strong enough to do anything on my own away from them. They smother my growth as a human being and just about made me helpless. This NOT LOVE.

It took alot of time before I could understand they did the best with what they had and that was not much.

A GREAT man once said ,when someone asked him how many time should I forgive, the response was seventy times seven. To me this means there are steps to forgiveness and we just keep forgiving till we one day we realize, we have forgiven. It is a process and we must work on it with a group or individual counceling.Maybe you won't need as much as I did but get help. It is the adult thing to do.

You can't imagine how good it feels to forgive. The eminence freedom, the gift of owning your own power and being the the most powerful magician in the world because you have the gift to forgive and magically bring your self PEACE..

Elephant in the House

If you live or have lived in a home with alcholism,drugs or any dependant sickness you know about chaos. The insanity in a home like this definitly changes who you are as you grow up.

I am an adult child of two alchoholic parents. Peace was a rare special comodity. The peace after the the insanity and chaos was so precious.

I'm lying in bed asleep when I hear a loud crash. Then there was screaming, cursing and yelling two floors below. I'm statled but dare not move. I listen and hear the blows and my grandmother saying No Jackie, No Russell. This goes on for a long time at least it seems so to a seven year old girl.

Then after the confusion comes the sudden quit, that powerful quiet after a terrible storm. So precious! So relieving! Finally I fall asleep and hope no one is dead.

My brother and I live in fear. A fear so deep and so scary we dare not move at times. We lived like this all of our childhood. Fear is a terrible thing to live with day in and day out, epecially when you can do nothing about it. Never knowing what may happen at any time.

I remember one Christmas when this chaos took hold of our Christmas day. The insanity infiltrated our day, all day. When they fell asleep we were so grateful. We quietly turned on the TV and watch Scrooge. We sat their close together with an emence feeling of relief.

Quiet is just part of life which most people can have when ever they choose. My definition of quiet as a child, was the quiet you get after the storm.The peace that surpasses all understanding.

Yesterday message at church was titled"Life in the Trenches".  It was about soldiers in the trenches in WW1 during Christmas. One group was British and the other was German. Stuck in the trenches at Christmas.

On Christmas day there was a cease fire. About 2am the Britches saw lights around trees on the German side. The Germans had lit some trees on their side and started singing Oh Tanenbaum . The Britches solders sang a Christmas song and back and forth they went. One German solder yelled out " come out and talk to us. The Britches said " you come out". Eventually they both came out of their fox holes and was talking to each other. They both found out how alike they were. Both wished their was no war.

The magic of Christmas is that people become more open minded toward each other. That once a year They come out of themselves and really try to touch each others hearts. Some people say it should be like this all year round. True it should be but if we didn't have this season there would not be this amount of giving.

This season opens our hearts and gives us permission to reach out to each other. A season of giving. So thank goodness  for this season of PEACE.

Christmas

This season talks alot about peace.Peace on earth. Where? Our world is in such turmoil. Where can we find peace. Some say in God. Well I am just not that simplictic.

I believe the power lies inside us not anyone else. We have the choice of how we live. It is up to us. We make our decisions no one else. WE have that wonderful power to choose. We are not puppets on a string. We must be responsible for what we do and say.

I have learnt to ask the question, what is my motive . Is it to help or hurt. According to my answer I can bring peace or chaos to this earth. I can bring peace or chaos to the people around me. Isn't that remarkable.
 We are powerful beings .Let's use that power to the best of our ability and bring a little peace to our small part of the world.